Divorcing a narcissist is difficult but not impossible. Tammy was married to a narcissist and was frequently subjected to emotional, physical and verbal abuse. Richard blamed her for everything. Tammy did not want to leave the marriage as she loved him and thought Richard would change over time and they would be happy like when they first met.
Worry and Threats
Tammy was also worried about her financial position and the potential impact that a divorce could have on the children. She lived in fear for another 7 years. Richard would shout and abuse Tammy in front of the children who would be traumatized from his outbursts. What made it worse is that Tammy had lost her confidence over time and no longer valued herself. She was exhausted and depressed. Richard threatened her that if they got divorced he would take the children away from her and make sure she was left financially destitute.
Divorcing a Narcissist
Tammy’s fear was that she would lose the children and not be able to maintain them even if she got custody of them. She felt trapped and paralyzed with fear. Her best friend eventually persuaded her to come and see us. I saw a woman who had been so abused that she had lost herself in the process. After a few consultations and by coaching Tammy to stand up to her narcissist husband she gained the confidence and courage to divorce Richard.
A Step Forward
We helped Tammy to get primary residence for the children and a good maintenance claim for the children. Today Tammy is in another relationship which is a healthy one and has a small business which she runs from home. If she could do it, you can do it. Let us help you to free yourself from the clutches of an abusive relationship. It is worth it for your own wellbeing and the wellbeing of the children. Divorcing a narcissist is possible.
* (These names have been changed for confidentiality purposes).
Author – Benita Ardenbaum